One of the downsides of NFP is that you're very conscious of your body. I kind of liked being ignorant. I viewed my reproductive system with the same type of benevolent ignorance that I viewed my digestive system...I don't know how it does what it does, but I'm sure that somehow everything is going okay.
Not anymore. And right now I know that something is happening with my body, but I have no idea what. My chart doesn't look like any of the charts in my book. I know I'm not pregnant, but I'm not getting my period either. Something is up.
Now, the internet is full of information, so I figured it would provide me with a wealth of NFP information as well. Unfortunately, I quickly found that most NFP/FAM practitioners fall into one of two groups:
1. Women who are doing FAM to try to get pregnant
2. Uber-Catholics
I checked out the Catholic websites first, figuring they were more pertinent. I was wrong. There was quite a bit on the moral reasons we need to use NFP, but nothing on how to do it and certainly nothing on troubleshooting. I did run across one woman's website that briefly discussed her personal experiences with NFP, but she danced around specifics. At one point she said that she didn't like to get too specific because she felt that she didn't want to discuss the goings-on of her bedroom, which made me want to tear at my hair and scream, "I don't care about the goings-on in your bedroom! I care about the goings-on of your chart! I want to know if what's happening to me is normal!" A lot of the Catholic websites had that tone, which is kind of like the tone of a high society lady who's forced to clean up after her dog in public parks. The law says she has to do it, but she definitely isn't going to talk readily about something so...gruesomely biological...in polite company. Little hints and innuendos is all she'll drop.
After that I looked at the websites for the women who were trying to get pregnant, and those were much more helpful. After being a nurses' aide for five years in college I'm not shy about talking about the body or its functions anymore. These women aren't either. I even found a gallery where women posted their charts, which was beyond helpful. The closest I can figure is that I'm having an anovulatory cycle, which makes sense. Right around the time I was supposed to ovulate I took a plane trip to Ohio, and after that school started, which has been non-stop stress. Unfortunately an anovulatory cycle can spin out for forty days or more (a Lent's worth!), so it might be awhile before my body rights itself.
If I knew more about NFP I'd start my own website with down-to-earth Catholic advice. I'm tempted to learn more so that I can do just that.
1 comment:
You could also just stop doing it. Because in truth, the Catholic theology behind it is bad. Like I stated before, according to Catholic moral theology, if you are for NFP, you are against gay and lesbian sexual intercourse in any situation. Does that really represent you?
There is plenty of other things that one can do to faithfully live out their Catholic identity.
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