When Mike and I got married we had to meet with the priest a few times before-hand, and one of the things he told us was that we were about to embark on something that society didn't support. At first I thought that was silly. After all, there was tremendous pressure to get coupled up and weddings are glamorized in all facets of the media. But now I think that what he meant wasn't that society wouldn't support our getting married - it was that society wouldn't support our staying married.
It seems that nowadays everyone loves a quick fix. If something isn't easy and doesn't bring you pleasure every second, it's not worth it. There's the same attitude with relationships. If a relationship isn't bliss and sunshine every moment, maybe it's time to move on to someone else.
The way I see it, that's silly. For one thing, no serious, long-term relationship is like that. Nothing worthwhile is constantly easy...there are always bad days with anything. When I consider how much grief I've gotten from my family and my job and how much reward I've gotten as well, the grief-to-reward ratio of my marriage seems positively amazing. My relationship with Mike is the best thing I've ever worked for.
There's a second reason, though, that I find more disturbing. It feels like in today's society people feel less of an obligation to one another. I think that, as human beings, we have a basic responsibility to one another. A responsibility to look out for one another, to treat each other with a ceratin amount of respect. However, if you've had a relationship with someone, those ties are stronger. It seems like the hype about self-entitlement has eclipsed the ideas of compassion and loyalty.
Yeah. It's not the best environment to support a lasting marriage.
I'm pretty grateful that we have a church that will support us since society apparently won't.
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society has many things that it doesn't support. things like good people winning, working hard to make a living rather than doing things the easy way no matter how many get hurt.
i've been married coming up to 21 years this coming july. there were all kinds of reasons to get divorced, me being a lesbian, bran being polyamourous, me being celebate, us having constant money troubles...the list goes on.
instead we choose to be flying buttresses to each other. as we stand alone, we're like the glass filled walls of the large cathedrals in europe that couldn't stand on their own. together, we make a pretty sturdy building :)
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