This past weekend Mike, our friend Matt, and I spent Saturday hanging out. We biked out to Matt's place, walked to the theater to see the matinee of the Simpsons movie, biked home, walked to Brady Street so we could wander around the street festival there, walked to Downer Avenue to see the bike race, and then walked home.
Now, all of the walking from Brady Street on was done in my strappy sandals. These sandals are great for walking a few blocks, but they start to kill your feet after more than a mile or so. By the time we were headed home from Downer Avenue we had walked about two miles already, and my feet were rapidly blistering. I started to hobble, and then stagger, and then cling to Mike as I shuffled along. Mike put his arm around me and I hung on his shoulder as I hobbled along, trying to put as little weight on my feet as possible. I made a few attempts to hop onto his back for a piggyback ride, but when that failed I giggled and went back to hobbling.
As we made our way up Oakland Avenue I realized that not only did it look like I was stumbling drunk at 7 PM, we were also passing by the church and the house where our priest lives. Now, since our congregation was huge I didn't think he'd recognize me even if he was looking out the window, but the idea that he spotted me and assumed I was drunk was highly amusing anyway.
"He's probably got his list of parishoners," I said, "and he put a check next to my name. 'I'll see her in confession next weekend.'"
I don't know if priests or nuns actually do that, but if they do, and someone goes to my church, let them know that I wasn't really drunk. I was just experiencing massive blisters.
Monday, July 30, 2007
Saturday, July 14, 2007
Life is Beautiful
This week I drove to Racine to do some shopping for the apartment. Even though I’ve been living here for a year now I felt that the apartment still needed to be girl-ified a little, so I went and found things on sale: curtains, hooks to keep the curtains back, a large basket to stash our board games in, a big glass vase, and silk flowers. When I was done arranging these things in the living room the place looked a lot more like home to me.
That evening I spent some much-needed time cuddling with Mike, and then headed off to work for my 11 PM shift. I had to park quite far from the building because the streets around it were closed for the annual Bastille Days festival. It started the next day but they were setting up that night. After I was done with work about twenty minutes later I headed back to my car. Even though I had to walk a few blocks of strange territory late at night, it wasn’t so bad. I made sure not to walk too timidly, and before long I was at my car.
As I waited at a red light I looked at some of Milwaukee’s taller buildings, including the beautiful Wisconsin Gas building. The streets were quiet as I turned onto Van Buren Avenue to head home. Just then the CD in my car started playing Jeff Buckley’s “Hallelujah,” which was one of the songs played at the end of my wedding reception. As I drove along I realized it was one of those moments that felt perfect…it was a beautiful, warm night, I was driving along the streets of a city that finally felt like home, and even though I felt like I could go anywhere tonight, I was coming home to a cozy apartment and a husband I loved. I was free and secure and loved and overwhelmed and excited all at once. Part of me wanted to laugh and part of me wanted to cry at the enormity of it all, but instead I just kept singing along to the song playing in my car.
I think that like most people I spend a lot of time striving for the next goal, concentrating on the next milestone. I think that’s fine…it encourages you to get ahead. But in my case, it also makes me feel like I’m constantly lacking. Instead of thinking about the things I’ve done or the blessings I have, I just have my eye on the next goal. Luckily I also have moments like the one I had that night, when I realize that life is so full and so beautiful that I get almost giddy.
I need to figure out how to have more of those moments.
That evening I spent some much-needed time cuddling with Mike, and then headed off to work for my 11 PM shift. I had to park quite far from the building because the streets around it were closed for the annual Bastille Days festival. It started the next day but they were setting up that night. After I was done with work about twenty minutes later I headed back to my car. Even though I had to walk a few blocks of strange territory late at night, it wasn’t so bad. I made sure not to walk too timidly, and before long I was at my car.
As I waited at a red light I looked at some of Milwaukee’s taller buildings, including the beautiful Wisconsin Gas building. The streets were quiet as I turned onto Van Buren Avenue to head home. Just then the CD in my car started playing Jeff Buckley’s “Hallelujah,” which was one of the songs played at the end of my wedding reception. As I drove along I realized it was one of those moments that felt perfect…it was a beautiful, warm night, I was driving along the streets of a city that finally felt like home, and even though I felt like I could go anywhere tonight, I was coming home to a cozy apartment and a husband I loved. I was free and secure and loved and overwhelmed and excited all at once. Part of me wanted to laugh and part of me wanted to cry at the enormity of it all, but instead I just kept singing along to the song playing in my car.
I think that like most people I spend a lot of time striving for the next goal, concentrating on the next milestone. I think that’s fine…it encourages you to get ahead. But in my case, it also makes me feel like I’m constantly lacking. Instead of thinking about the things I’ve done or the blessings I have, I just have my eye on the next goal. Luckily I also have moments like the one I had that night, when I realize that life is so full and so beautiful that I get almost giddy.
I need to figure out how to have more of those moments.
Wednesday, July 11, 2007
Bits and Pieces
Last week Mike and I performed our marital duties without the protection of a condom, relying solely on Natural Family Planning.
Annnnnnnnnnd...it worked! I finished my cycle and started a new one. No pregnancy!
Granted, one episode of intercourse doesn't prove anything yet, but it was still encouraging. I'm finally getting the hang of this NFP stuff.
In other news that only Catholics will find funny, Mike's mom wanted us to pray to St. Jude to help us get a house. I'm not sure if her idea for us to pray to the patron of hopeless causes was thoughtful or a little insulting. Either way, I suppose it wouldn't hurt.
Annnnnnnnnnd...it worked! I finished my cycle and started a new one. No pregnancy!
Granted, one episode of intercourse doesn't prove anything yet, but it was still encouraging. I'm finally getting the hang of this NFP stuff.
In other news that only Catholics will find funny, Mike's mom wanted us to pray to St. Jude to help us get a house. I'm not sure if her idea for us to pray to the patron of hopeless causes was thoughtful or a little insulting. Either way, I suppose it wouldn't hurt.
Thursday, July 5, 2007
Godparenting
I'm not pregnant, or even close, but with two of my close friends from college having babies this summer I've started to think about childbearing. And in addition to finding a new apartment* and getting all the gear associated with babies, I've started thinking about baptism.
Mike and I are both practicing Catholics, and I'm learning that it's a rare thing in my generation. Of all my friends and family members I only know three people my age who are churchgoing Catholics...my married friends Jen and Joel, and my friend Meghan who goes to church without her husband. Other than that, all my other Catholic friends and family are either non-practicing, unconfirmed, or otherwise ineligible.
This scares me because Mike and I are still trying to use NFP, and I think that within the next cycle or two we're going to try winging it without condoms. While part of me thinks that we'll be fine, another part of me is bracing for pregnancy. That means also bracing for delivery, and childrearing, and baptism. And I have no idea what we'll do when the time comes.
I'm sure nobody reads this blog, but if any of you do and are practicing Catholics who would like to be a godparent to a kid in the Milwaukee area, let me know. Hopefully it's a bridge we won't have to cross for three years or so, but I'm trying to be prepared.
Mike and I are both practicing Catholics, and I'm learning that it's a rare thing in my generation. Of all my friends and family members I only know three people my age who are churchgoing Catholics...my married friends Jen and Joel, and my friend Meghan who goes to church without her husband. Other than that, all my other Catholic friends and family are either non-practicing, unconfirmed, or otherwise ineligible.
This scares me because Mike and I are still trying to use NFP, and I think that within the next cycle or two we're going to try winging it without condoms. While part of me thinks that we'll be fine, another part of me is bracing for pregnancy. That means also bracing for delivery, and childrearing, and baptism. And I have no idea what we'll do when the time comes.
I'm sure nobody reads this blog, but if any of you do and are practicing Catholics who would like to be a godparent to a kid in the Milwaukee area, let me know. Hopefully it's a bridge we won't have to cross for three years or so, but I'm trying to be prepared.
Monday, April 30, 2007
The other parish
This weekend Mike and I went camping, so we were out of town on Sunday morning. We decided that rather than go to church in the little town where we were staying, we'd just wait and go to church Sunday night in Milwaukee. So that's what we did. The only problem was our parish doesn't have Sunday night Masses, so we had to go to another church nearby.
Going to this church was actually kind of nostalgic. When Mike found out that I wanted to start attending church again he volunteered to go with me, so we went to this one because of the nighttime Mass. I think we only went once or twice...we soon found out that getting out of the apartment at night was actually harder than going first thing in the morning. However, it was still nice to go back.
They have a new priest there...well, a priest that's new to the parish anyway. He looked to be in his early sixties. I liked him on sight...he was thin, bald, stooped, and had thick glasses. He looked like he had spent a lot of time both studying and fasting, and he seemed like an appropriate guide for our journey through Mass.
The service was nice. It felt a little awkward because the melodies are different, the responses are different, but the overall Mass is so similar that you feel that you should be keeping up. Overall, though, I enjoyed it. It's nice to know that if we somehow miss the Masses at our home church, we have another nice church to go to.
Going to this church was actually kind of nostalgic. When Mike found out that I wanted to start attending church again he volunteered to go with me, so we went to this one because of the nighttime Mass. I think we only went once or twice...we soon found out that getting out of the apartment at night was actually harder than going first thing in the morning. However, it was still nice to go back.
They have a new priest there...well, a priest that's new to the parish anyway. He looked to be in his early sixties. I liked him on sight...he was thin, bald, stooped, and had thick glasses. He looked like he had spent a lot of time both studying and fasting, and he seemed like an appropriate guide for our journey through Mass.
The service was nice. It felt a little awkward because the melodies are different, the responses are different, but the overall Mass is so similar that you feel that you should be keeping up. Overall, though, I enjoyed it. It's nice to know that if we somehow miss the Masses at our home church, we have another nice church to go to.
Tuesday, April 24, 2007
This is not the dumbest thing I've thought of
I posted in my other blog about how I wanted to try Natural Family Planning. I was shocked at how critical the reaction was. After reading Marc's statistics - which I really think are based on the Rhythm Method, not Fertility Awareness - Mike got very uneasy, and told me that he thinks that NFP is too risky to try. So it's back to the pills for me. All in all, this has been a huge disappointment. Mike told me that I could keep researching and reading about it, but I'd rather not. If he's going to chicken out in the end, then I'd rather not get my heart set on it more than I already have. I was really looking forward to not worrying about taking a pill at 9 PM every night, not being concerned if I missed one, not worrying about a future that featured cancer or blood clots or any of the other nasty side-effects that can come when you take birth control pills.
So, yeah. So much for that little experiment.
It does raise an interesting point, though. In both the posting on my blog and in my conversations with friends, they've questioned my motivation for trying NFP, which is my religion. There are other reasons I want to try it - reasons too personal, too numerous, and too irrelevant to the topic to go into here - but when they hear "Natural Family Planning," they instantly think "Catholic brainwashing."
Most of the time when I make choices that people disagree with, they say I'm nuts but don't pursue it much farther than that. When I renew my contract year after year at my poor urban high school, my friends roll their eyes but say they understand my decision. When I told Mike that I was going to start using menstrual cups because it was healthier for both me and the environment, he said it was weird, but it was also my body. When I chose to buy my Chevy Prizm based on the fact that it reminded me of my Geo Metro, my friends just shrugged and didn't say a word about researching warranties or resale value or reliability.
But when I make a choice and cite my religion as an influence in that decision, suddenly I'm wrong.
I hate to break it to everyone, but the vast majority of my decisions aren't based on scientific facts or hours of research. I buy things on a whim, I take the easy route, I cave in to peer pressure, I make decisions that will result in an immediate gain without considering the long-term repercussions. In short, I make choices for dumb reasons. I'm shocked that people consider my religious values to be worse criteria than other standards I've used.
Seriously, people. Let's think about this.
So, yeah. So much for that little experiment.
It does raise an interesting point, though. In both the posting on my blog and in my conversations with friends, they've questioned my motivation for trying NFP, which is my religion. There are other reasons I want to try it - reasons too personal, too numerous, and too irrelevant to the topic to go into here - but when they hear "Natural Family Planning," they instantly think "Catholic brainwashing."
Most of the time when I make choices that people disagree with, they say I'm nuts but don't pursue it much farther than that. When I renew my contract year after year at my poor urban high school, my friends roll their eyes but say they understand my decision. When I told Mike that I was going to start using menstrual cups because it was healthier for both me and the environment, he said it was weird, but it was also my body. When I chose to buy my Chevy Prizm based on the fact that it reminded me of my Geo Metro, my friends just shrugged and didn't say a word about researching warranties or resale value or reliability.
But when I make a choice and cite my religion as an influence in that decision, suddenly I'm wrong.
I hate to break it to everyone, but the vast majority of my decisions aren't based on scientific facts or hours of research. I buy things on a whim, I take the easy route, I cave in to peer pressure, I make decisions that will result in an immediate gain without considering the long-term repercussions. In short, I make choices for dumb reasons. I'm shocked that people consider my religious values to be worse criteria than other standards I've used.
Seriously, people. Let's think about this.
Sunday, April 22, 2007
NFP & FAM
Today Mike and I took a tour around town, and one of the places we stopped was the mall. After we ate lunch Mike suggested that we stop in Borders* so I can look for a book Jen recommended to me called Taking Charge of Your Fertility. It's partially about how to concieve, but it also has detailed information about the Fertility Awareness Method, which is a big part of Natural Family Planning. The big difference is that in FAM couples use condoms during the fertile period, while NFP couples abstain completely.
Sorry, Mike.
Anyway, it's not something that I'm going to do for sure, it's just something I'm checking out. Mike is pretty apprehensive, and I can't say I blame him. The thought of trying it makes me nervous too, but if it seems like it would work it's something I'd love to attempt.
So we'll see.
* Mike works for a bookstore, but not Borders. In my defense, though, his bookstore didn't have the book in stock and it was taking forever to come in, so I felt justified in going somewhere else. Mike kept his head down the whole time, though.
Sorry, Mike.
Anyway, it's not something that I'm going to do for sure, it's just something I'm checking out. Mike is pretty apprehensive, and I can't say I blame him. The thought of trying it makes me nervous too, but if it seems like it would work it's something I'd love to attempt.
So we'll see.
* Mike works for a bookstore, but not Borders. In my defense, though, his bookstore didn't have the book in stock and it was taking forever to come in, so I felt justified in going somewhere else. Mike kept his head down the whole time, though.
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